Do these people truly exist...

...or did photographers for "pregnancy" books take the two happiest people on the freaking earth and put them together for a seemlessly perfect picture that only us frazzled irritated pregnant people would catch?? I mean...seriously.... I was standing in CVS yesterday waiting on my prescription for my sinus infection (sweet!) and I was purusing the book section... first off... I didn't know they had a book section and secondly, the first book I grabbed was a "pregnancy journal" of some sort. Here are the annoying and irritating things that jumped out first and foremost to me:

1) the woman on the front was so peaceful looking and happy... she was like 19 months preggo and was completely content with being a mammoth, or so she appeared

2) I skipped past the part about pre-conception... yeah I know how you get preggo and ended up on the page where the man and the woman stand-ins were in a full fledged romantic yet blissful hug swooning over the fact that the 19 month pregnant woman was finally going to give birth.... Okay... as exciting as my pregnancy was the first time, I don't ever remember Jerry and I ever embracing that way or acting that excited. Call my cynical but I just don't think it happens. Not to mention, at 19 months preggo touching is the last thing you want considering the fact that touching was the thing that got you to 19 months preggo, visions of your feet and epidurals dancing in your "fluffy" head.

3) The healthy eating part was completely skipped as I looked at the 40 count bag of pizza rolls sitting in my cart.

4) and finally... but certainly the most important... there was a section for dads to first read and then journal... this made me grin. Jerry would never ever do this for me. That would require some sort of act of God himself... it's just odd. Some men may journal and read about their coming child, which I am very jealous of, but in reality, most men won't. It's the woman's job to prepare and be excited, to be pregnant with that sweet baby, to get everything packed and cleaned.... and the men are there to basically drive you to the hospital when your water breaks.

My name was called by the perky pharmacist and I vowed to never touch another stupid pregnancy book again. It put me in a bad mood which is definitely easy these days considering I am 7 months pregnant and feel completely alone and that no one understands and the people in those books make me want to hurle for the 19th time.

I am excited about having this baby, don't get me wrong, but I am just not "over the moon giddy let's all hug and swoon and journal" kind of excited. For some reason, I am dreading it. Not the baby part, the having two children part. The being "completely and utterly a mother for the rest of my life and nothing more" part. The frumpy housewife look, the fighting part, the sick children at the same time part, marriage might fall apart part... it's the truth and being 7 months pregnant makes you start to wonder and dread some things. I sound like a horrible mother, but honestly, I know that some of you mothers out there have gone through the same fears and apprehensions I am going through. I didn't have one fear with my first, but this second is sending me to Worriesville without a map.